No Orgasms from Lamborghini Urus

Lambo, put that condom away. We are not going to play. Not only am I not excited, I am not aroused or even slightly interested. Welcome to Urus. Of course it is fast. Of course it is powerful. It is a Lamborghini, but I expected so much more…

It’s not just me, right? Like some of you out there hate this as much as I do? I hate it because for some reason making a Lamborghini SUV makes it more accessible and functional in the day-to-day… And I hate that. Lamborghini and other luxury goods, in general, are about the nonsensical and excessive-ness of the possession of luxury items. As an EXTREME luxury brand, I didn’t want something that made sense to have or need or which actually could be something more useful that just a “see what I have and it goes fast” toy(~600 horsies, btw). Yes, I am that superficial. I also happen to hate the overall look of the vehicle. The Lamborghini Urus(for some reason the word “Anus” comes to mind) just is all sorts of wrong for me. It’s the first SUV to come out of Lambo in over 20 years. The earliest it could potentially be in production will be between 2015 to 2017.

More amazing pics and information on the URUS at my friend’s place, Nafterli’s HERE. He has a gorgeous collection of Urus pics as well as car specs. Check out his site and vote for him as he is being nominated for the Best Sports Blog category in Kenya sponsored by the Bloggers Association of Kenya. It’s important to help support the works and efforts of our car and speed loving brethren all over the world, and Nafterli does a damn good job posting car porn so you don’t have to spend hours looking for great pics!

Mr. Carter Jung over at Road & Track wrote an article called “Lamborghini SUV – First Look At last, a family-friendly Lambo. WHHHAAAAT?! Is that suppose to be a goal to strive to? “Family-friendly Lambo” just sounds like cow sh*t to me. Speaking of cows… Oh, it gets better….

The name Urus comes from an extinct breed of giant cow that lived in Europe and was called the aurochs. These fabled creatures were mentioned by Julius Caesar in the chronicles of the Gallic Wars. Later, in the Middle Ages, the hunting of the aurochs was restricted to the noble class. The last known aurochs died in 1627 in the Jaktorow forest in Poland. These giant cows were known to be aggressive, but were also likely domesticated into breeding cattle.
International Business Times on how Lamborghini came up with the name

Words currently floating in my head: Anus, Giant Cow, Lamborghini. Something failed along the way.

Here’s a photo-collage I made…. You see it, right? You see the Cayenne in there? A Murano? Even BMW’s SUVs. I may be a hater, but you see it too, right?

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Categories: Cars, Exotic, Lambo, Lamborghini

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